Okay, I know that some women out there read my blog.... I hope that I've been a decent source of entertainment for you folks.
Well, thanks for hanging around. I don't know if you wanted any eHarmony advice... but I'll give it a shot.
I considered giving this "From the labs" status, but the fact is... this isn't based on any experience whatsoever. It's basically an answer to my own mental question, "If I were to start an eHarmony Cracked system for women, where would I start?"
If any ladies want to develop this... I'd be interested in hearing your stories.
And guys... go ahead and read this. I think you'll get a few good laughs.
The Photo
A lot of women enter the world of online dating in the hopes that they'll find men who judge them for their "inside qualities" rather than appearances.
Well... get over it. Men are stupid, idiotic, and visual creatures. And the internet makes this problem worse, not better. As I see it, there are a couple of advantages of online dating for women: it exposes them to people they would not have ordinarily met, and it provides an opportunity for women to better "screen" men in a safe atmosphere. But it doesn't fundamentally change male psychology. Sorry.
Bottom line - dress up nice, and put up good photos. Believe me, if you're hot, you'll get more male attention than you want on eHarmony.
What if you're not hot? Guess what - you're sending your profile to a lot of guys. Some of them will think you're attractive. Even if you're heavy. Or bald. Or... whatever. So, dress up nice, show some confidence, and show the pictures. After all, do you really want to go on a date with a guy who isn't attracted to you?
Don't hide your photos. And don't use deceptive shots. It just creates an air of unfriendliness. And even if you land a date with someone with deceptive photos... you're starting on the wrong foot. Yes, some guys will fall for "headshots only" that avoid the fact that you're overweight... but it'll just end up being a bad scene when you go on a date. Stick with the guys who know what they're getting, and like it.
So... stop living in fantasy land, and embrace reality. Guys are guys. And that's not such a bad thing.
The profile
If you've got hot photos... you don't have to work very hard on the profile. You can be very vague. Guys will chase you, and will ask you about details. If they care. Relax. It's not that important.
If you're not as attractive... Don't show weakness in the profile. Be effusive about the things you enjoy, and the things that you're passionate about. Don't say anything bad about yourself.
Statements that show insecurity? Don't use them. At all. They make you look unattractive. Even statements like, "I'm shy at first". Stay positive and upbeat.
Guided communication
Again, stay positive and upbeat. But don't be afraid to ask good questions. Guys will answer them.
Don't be afraid to set the pace
Let's face it. Most of the guys on eHarmony are spineless wimps when it comes to making "the next step" with a woman. Don't be afraid to be agressive.
If an interesting guy hasn't initated communication with you? Go ahead and initiate it yourself.
If you prefer fast track to guided communication? Request the fast-track.
If they guy isn't asking for your phone number? Mention that you'd like to talk on the phone.
Trust me, most guys won't think badly of a woman who moves the agenda forward. And a lot of men really need to be pushed to the next step.
Overall? Yes, women do outnumber men on eHarmony... but I still think women have the advantage.
Then again, I could be wrong.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I had no problem getting dates on eH. Even one boy who flew across the country to meet me (did not go well and would probably not do that again). But, every one of those happened because I initiated. My boyfriend was a little embarrassed when I pointed that out to him months later.
Post a Comment