Phase 2: Establishing congruence

In addition to the "trial balloons" that people try during Phase 2 attachment, another subtle evaluation usually takes place during Phase two.

As you probably realize, Phases 0 and 1 go quickly. In fact, if they aren't crossed within the first few dates, it becomes very difficult to escape the "comfortable friend zone".

And, because the time flies by quickly, it's hard to evaluate what a person is really like.

Hey, everyone's on good behavior during the first few dates. You both may dress a little better than normal. She may be more complimentary. You may leave bigger tips than you normally do. You may act a little funnier. She may laugh at more of your jokes.

And, yes, beginning pick-up-artists try "tricks" that don't fit in with their personality.

To some degree, this behavior is expected. But, if it's a large gap, you won't last long.

So... in phase 2 attachment, take your time. Get to know what she's really like, once "proper dating" behavior starts to fade away.

You know that she's evaluating you too.