Phase 2: Building bridges of trust

(Pardon me for not talking about physical escalation in Phase 2 as promised. I realized that there's still ground that needs to be covered...)

If there's a typical interaction that happens in Phase 2 of a relationship, it's what I call "building bridges of trust".

At the end of Phase 1, you're recognizing the potential for a special relationship.

But, how do you determine if a person is trustworthy of that status?

You try them out. And see how they react.

Cautiously.

Usually, the process begins with the gradual sharing of things that you "don't usually tell other people". Starting with things that are less offensive.

She accepts, or she doesn't.

And, hopefully, she'll share as well. And you start to understand, at least, how she describes herself. Which may, or may not reflect who she really is... but at least you'll start to understand the person that she wants to be, and the fears that she expresses.

And it's an opportunity to strengthen the bonds of idealization, mirroring, and twinship.

And, later in the process of Phase 2, you go beyond words.

She'll ask things of you. You say whether you'll do them... or not.

And you'll ask things of her, as well. And she'll agree... or not.

Fair's fair.

But, be patient when you build trust bridges. Because, when you ask too much too fast... she'll start getting scared.

Phases 0 and 1 can be covered in one date, if your game is tight. Phase 2 takes months. And most attempts to speed up phase two will cause her to freak out.

Enjoy the process of getting to know each other. Decide whether she's worthy of your trust. And decide whether you want be the person that she can develop trust with.

And if both of you are a bit unsure, but wanting a little more... you're both in great position to navigate Phase 2 successfully.