Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Have a "narrow" search? eHarmony ain't your best bet.

Lately, one of the most common problems voiced in the Google Group is one saying, essentially, "I just don't get matches like the ones I'm looking for."

But, then, you take a look at the criteria they're espousing... It's easy to see why they're having such trouble.

From my understanding, eHarmony proposes that two people are a match when it's models predict that they will be in the top 25% in relationship satisfaction.

That's eHarmony's model. Not yours. And eHarmony's model is based on an overall assessment of multiple psychological traits.

Now, it stands to reason that, if it's only matching you with the "top 25%", that means that you won't see the bottom 75%. So, by using eHarmony, you're already allowing them to make choices that you wouldn't necessarily make.

Now, if you want to make that even narrower - your search is going to be much more challenging.

Say... you're only interested in people who share very narrow interests with you.

Or, you're only willing to talk to the 9's and 10's.

Or, you're only interested in folks that earn a six-digit salary.

That's fine. But eHarmony isn't designed to help you find these niches. And you might be better off meeting people through a more specialized website. Or in (G-d forbid) real-live groups that are populated with the women that you're interested in.

Anyway... sorry. But, when you sign up for eHarmony, you are buying into their model that you'll be happier by not meeting the 75% of the population that significantly differ from you in their list of core psychological traits.

For me, it's been a helpful service.

But if you're not willing to meet people outside of your narrow focus... eHarmony probably isn't the way to go.

1 comment:

eHarmony Blog said...

We've even heard people say, "I don't get matches like the ones that I wrote that I'm looking for in my profile."

This is an example of what people expect out of their $60.