War Story: Recovery from an email overheat

Continued from yesterday...

It's clear... she's still eager to meet me. But she's feeling unsafe.

Why?

Because we're meeting in a crowded state park? Probably not. In her profile, she says that she hikes a lot. And she's not fearful of the random guys she might run into.

She's in fear because she's "overheated". She's seeing more romantic potential than I had planned. When I mentioned picnic, I was thinking sack lunches, conversation, and some walking of well-trafficked areas. She's thinking isolation, wine, cheese, and losing control.

Her thoughts are scary to her right now - she doesn't know me yet! So, we need to make her comfortable... but not ruin the idealization process that got us this far. So... here's my reply.

I was figuring that the fall foliage crowds would keep you feeling safe... but I totally understand. (Part of the reason I wanted to avoid restaurants in [City of the park] - they'd probably be mobbed.)

Anyway, [Town she mentioned] has some things going for it... but [Another town] might be more fun. (The downtown area isn't nearly as fun as [the town I picked]) And I know a couple of good places to eat in [the town I mentioned]...

We'll talk later.

Here we go. I'm not saying that I was wrong... I'm just saying that, if she's uncomfortable, I have other places where we can have some fun. And I'm still "leading the way" to the fun.

Her reply?

[The city I said] would be great! You name the place. And thanks for understanding. I really appreciate it.

Ever-eager for the meetup, she calls on Friday night. I don't answer, but pick up her message on voice mail. Oddly enough, she mentions the strange ethnic style of food that I was going to suggest.

So, if she's mentioning the type of food that I was going to suggest... am I going to lose the idealization opportunity?

Heck no. And it's a mirroring opportunity to boot. I text out:

LOL - I was going to ask if [ethnicity] would be too weird for you. [Name of restaraunt], 12:00, send u address tomorrow AM.

----------------------

Next morning, I email:

Hey, XXXX!

Don't know if you got my text message... You SO cracked me up - I was going to call and ask if you thought [ethnicity of] food was too weird for you. I guess not. (+5 points)

So, let's meet up at:

[Restaraunt address]

Look forward to meeting you in person!

She replies:

Scott,
Yes, I did - that was awesome. I'm really glad, and I think we're going to have fun. (talks about the local connection to that type of food)

I like to try new things when the opportunity arises. You never know when a rich new experience is going to present itself, and that has given me a very full life. Plus, weird, obscure, offbeat and artsy things are usually interesting.

I'm looking forward to it too...see you tomorrow. :-)

And, yes. The date went very well, and led to a 3-month relationship. Unfortunately, some hidden deal-killers kept things from going further... but, certainly, no regrets.