How do you overcome conversational anxiety? Practice.

When it comes down to the first date, one of the more realistic fears that people have is in holding a conversation. (Establishing touch is also a big fear, but we've covered that in the past.)

In my experience, fear of awkward conversation is the end result of a different type of "failure spiral". The spiral goes something like this:

You become anxious about starting a conversation.
You avoid having the conversation.
You don't practice, because you're anxious.
You become more anxious.
You avoid more conversations.
You become even less practiced.

And so on.

Believe me, I've been in that spiral. And the first step in overcoming conversational shyness is to start reversing that spiral.

The key? Get more practice.

Make it a goal to talk to more strangers.

Don't even try to think of these as "approaches". Talk to men and women. In fact, in the beginning, it's probably better if you don't practice on people that you're attracted to.

I think you'll be surprised at how many strangers will actually want to engage you in conversation. I know that I was.

Just ask questions. About what they're carrying. Or where they're going. Whether they live or work nearby.

And learn to get the conversation flowing.

Because, when you're back in the habit of having conversations with strangers, it becomes much easier to have conversations on your dates.