Open Communication: Getting the number

When most guys ask for a woman's phone number on eHarmony, they make it much more of a struggle than it needs to be.

Most guys don't ask for a phone number until they're almost certain that they want to meet.

Of course, the woman senses this quickly. She knows that the guy will come on strong, if she gives the digits.

And if she's not so sure... she's going to want to build her comfort level by extending communication further.

Unfortunately, as the seduction literature has said time and time again, comfort building before attraction is a fast-track to the friend zone.

So, it's understandable why the standard approach doesn't work well. And why my templates do something different.

Bottom line? You're a busy guy. (And you should be.) You're finding a few things that you're cautiously interested in finding more about, as is she. She's asking a lot of questions. This is a good thing.

But you're busy. You don't have time to type long emails. And you certainly don't have hours and hours to have text chats with even your best friends. Much less, a woman you don't even know yet.

Bottom line? The phone (and meeting in person) are the only ways to make this go forward.

For beginners, though, this can be a difficult perception to maintain. Which is why I developed the template system.

But, when you want to skip the templates... it's easy to shatter this perception.

We'll talk about some common mistakes tomorrow.