Need to learn approach? eHarmony isn't the way to learn.

eHarmony can be appealing to people who are anxious about meeting women.

And a lot of guys have reasons for that fear to be natural. They may be leaving a long-term relationship or marriage. And that relationship may have been hellaciously bad.

And it does seem a lot easier to meet women on eHarmony.

You don't have to face rejection in person.

And if you're still awkward in starting conversations, guided communication can seem like a comfort.

But, really? If you're just starting to date again, eHarmony isn't the best way to re-learn (or, in some cases, learn) these skills.

The fact is, anxiety gets better when you face the anxiety. Over and over again. Until the anxiety finally goes away. Or gives way to excitement.

Conversational and attraction skills improve with practice. And there's no substitute for that practice.

Unfortunately, eHarmony will slow your ability to meet women, and get the practice that you need.

So, if you need to get over your anxiety... get your feet wet. Don't rely on eHarmony (and, definitely, don't rely on this website) as your only source to meet women.

Remember, there's a reason why the internet Pick-up artists started in the bar.

It wasn't because "bar chicks" are better than other women.

It's because you can introduce yourself to a lot of women quickly, without looking weird.

Now, I'm not saying you have to start in the bar. Or even go to the bar.

But, remember, the only way to build skill and defeat anxiety is practice.