"Relationship guy" or "Lust object"? You CAN have it both ways!

Before I go into tomorrow's (first-ever) product review, there's a bit of "Seduction community" lore that I want to address...

According to classic pickup artist lore, women quickly sort guys into categories. Among the more desirable categories are those of being "The provider" and of being "The seducer".

According to the lore, "The provider" is the guy that women want to be in a long-term relationship with. He's a solid guy. He's giving, and he won't abuse. He's thoughtful, and considerate. And he'll take care of a woman well.

Of course, there's a fine line between the "nice guy" and the "provider". Phony "nice guys" are to be avoided. And it takes a lot of time for a woman to decide if a guy is truly a provider.

Bottom-line? Even if a guy is a good provider, and a woman is looking for someone to take that role, it's going to take months for the woman decides she's comfortable enough to sleep with the guy. (On the other hand, unlike the "seduction community", I won't disagree with anyone who chooses this path.)

On the other hand, according to seduction lore, there's another class of men. The "Seducers". These men are the objects of lust. Seducers are attractive, charming, and seductive. They know how to meet a woman's sexual needs, and don't confuse sexual urges for love. And when the good times are over? The two of you can go your own ways, without any messy drama. Of course, not all women want a seducer in their lives at any given moment... but that's okay to most seducers.

Unlike the "provider", it's quickly clear to women that "seducers" aren't stereotypic nice guys. So... it's easier for a "seducer" to get laid quickly than it is for a "provider".

Because of this, standard seduction lore is to act like a full-out seducer, and to deflect any "provider"-type questions as funny and irrelevant. According to PUA lore, it's impossible to be both a seducer and a provider. And for guys who want a long-term relationship? They encourage them to act like seducers, and then shift gears later.

And that sums up seduction lore.

The funny thing is, despite many PUA's insistence that one person can't be both a provider and a seducer... My experience is different.

There are elements that can be successfully combined.

The "seducer" has a lot of good traits. He's charming. Assertive. A guy who can "take charge" in a relationship. A guy who understands women's physical desires, and doesn't make women ashamed of them. A guy who can take a relationship one day at a time, and has the confidence to know he can find another woman when he knows things aren't working out.

On the other hand, the "provider" has a lot of desirable traits as well. He's stable and solid, economically and emotionally. He won't selfishly try to take advantage of women. He can change his behavior if he sees a woman being hurt. He can make reasonable compromises in a relationship (but, unlike the "nice guys", won't harm himself or act ingenuinely to do so). And he's ready to bond with someone, if things are right.

When you combine the good things of both worlds, you can have the advantages of both worlds. In an early relationship you can be both the guy she lusts after, and the guy she sees a glimmer of a chance of being in a relationship with.

And I've done it many times.