On the date, focus on emotions, not facts.

Recent posts have stressed the theme of how most guys, in order to let women know more about them (and for them to get to know the woman) focus on facts. And I've also been discussing how sharing each other's emotional worlds can be a much more effective strategy.

This applies to the date, as well.

A lot of people who are new to dating flounder in the facts. What have you done? What are you doing? What things do you like? Where and when did you do these things?

Actually, it's better to use these questions as pathways to open emotional worlds - not to ask further factual questions.

So, let's say that you've learned that the woman works as a teacher.

You could follow up with facts. What school do you work at? How long have you worked there? Where did you go to college? And once you've exhausted those facts, you could move on to other facts - where she grew up, and so on.

But you'd be missing out giving her an opportunity to share her emotional world.

Is teaching something that she's always wanted to do? Is this the culmination of her dream? If not, what were her dreams? If so, what fantasies did she have on going into this field? Has reality been as good as her dreams?

What keeps her going at the job? What things is she most enthusiastic about? What are the challenges that she overcomes?

Once you open that emotional gateway, you'll have a lot more questions.

And, in return, she'll ask you questions that are just as good.

And, after the first date, you'll have much more of an emotional connection than she'll experience with most guys.

And that's a good thing.