When comfort is high, and attaction is low...

One of the most frustrating experiences people have when they're starting to do well on eHarmony is when they've built a comfort level with a woman, but the level of attraction is low.

When the comfort level is high, a woman will feel okay about spending time with you. She knows that you're a decent, solid guy. She knows that you're likable in some way.

But, when you haven't built a sense of attraction... there's no sense of tension.

She knows that you want to be with her. You're reliable, and comfortable. Good to have around when she needs to feel desired.

And you can be put away again, if she finds someone who needs to be chased. Because you're a handy "backup man".

So, what behaviors can you expect when comfort is high, but attraction is low?

• She doesn't agree to a phone call or date, but still wants to talk online.
• You go on a lot of dates, but she turns away your attempts to advance the relationship.
  
• She flakes on dates, but still wants to continue talking with you.
• She sees you as a friend, but nothing more.

When you're in this spot... the best thing to do is to is figure out why attraction is low.

What are you doing that makes you available in this way?

Figure it out. Because you'll need it for the next step.

(By the way, tomorrows article will be posted in the evening. Thanks for reading - and have a great new year!)